Queen or Slave? About the turning point of Royalty into Submissiveness

Queen or Slave?

About the turning point of Royalty into Submissiveness

and vice versa?

a contemplation for all women and men

(Thanks to Jelena Voinov for inspiring me about this topic during a chat in the streets of Amsterdam)

In nature there are many species where the whole existance of males centres around impressing the females: Dances, Fights, Tarting up with exuberant outfits – all in the service to attract the attention of the woman.

– and all of course under the flag of keeping the race alive, the romantic or heroe like behaviour all under the primitive but essential goal:

sex = reproduction, life goes on!

Let’s transfer that to our human race:

Even though most of us are incredibly evolved and educated human beings and our primary goal is not only to stay alive and reproduce, in essence we (sometimes) might still behave the same -metaphorically speaking…


the early beginnings of a new love, the courtship phase, when everything seems to be possible, all doors are open…all possibilites lay ahead, time is never an issue, because the desire to be with is so strong that it overcomes all obstacles.

You are being spoiled, your man opens the door for you, he brings you your tea, champagne or coffee to bed, he runs a bath for you, cooks dinner for you –

does all that is in his power to be there for YOU– protect YOU and serve YOU.

then comes the turning point:

With getting to know each other better, maybe living together, maybe being absorbed in the care for the kids for instance the attentiveness wears off, and very often – the roles more or less gradually reverse:

then it is the woman who serves the guy, brings the slippers, prepares breakfast, cooks, organizes, keeps his back free, thinks for both and multitasks next to her regular professional duties -and he sits back – enjoys – and/or -in the worst case – takes it for granted.

Did you ever experience the same in one of your intimate relationships?

Why does this happen?

When does it happen?

What can you do to avoid it?

– and :

maybe most interesting of all:

what do WE do as women to allow this or even actively make this happen?

Wouldn’t it be wonderful

if at any point we could easily swap between the roles-

to be there for each other as queens, kings, happy “slaves” and proud servants?

  • if the “labels” would disappear altogether and all interaction was based on appreciation, honesty and discovering each other new every day!

(hint: when you wear your crown –  literally or metaphorically – it’s much more likely you will be treated like a queen…!)

I am curious to hear what you think,  feel and have experienced!

I’d love to hear your comments !







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